No one in
the UK is following the US presidential election anymore. Why? Because everyone
is glued to the Jimmy Savile case. It's a double whammy. Not only has the
country's long-treasured children's TV presenter, beloved national radio DJ and
charity champion been revealed to be a nasty sexual predator and paedophile,
but its most trusted institution—the BBC—has been exposed as a harbourer of
such vermin.
First of
all, who allowed Savile to get away with this behaviour for so many years?
I'll tell you who: the Great British public. As a British citizen, I’ll take my
share of the blame, as painful (as I will come on to explain) as that may be.
The buck stops with us, not with the BBC, not even with the head of our state,
whose role it is to protect us, but with the people who make Britain so great.
The British public allowed a bully to win, time and time again.
The problem
begins with the way we put our dignitaries on pedestals and have a long history
of doing so. We do so because, ultimately, we are afraid of them. We feel they
have power over us. We do not stand up to the upper echelons of our society,
even when they behave atrociously. I’m not talking about our celebrities; we
are nothing if not weary of celebrities, even Royals behaving badly (Fergie,
Princess Margaret, Harry) are given little sympathy when they are caught with
their pants down in celebrity hang outs, but we do hold an unquestioning
reverence for our beloved Queen and her chosen ones. People like Jimmy Savile,
who are knighted and ratified by the head of our state, are therefore afforded
the same respect. How could the Queen get it wrong? How could he be a bad
person? Who are you or I to question him? Herein lies the problem. Respect by
default is dangerous. It is what bullies thrive on.
Sir (making
a point here) Jimmy Savile was a bully. Watch any old footage of him and look
closely. You will see a bully. You will slap your forehead and say, "of
course". He grabs a woman in a crowd and kisses her on the lips, making a
lascivious smacking noise with his mouth. He puts his arms a little too tightly
around a bunch of teenage girls on Top of the Pops. He sits a young child he
has "fixed" something wonderful for on his knee and grins with satisfaction.
He is the original child snatcher, handing out goodies in order to have his
wicked way. And we all fell for it. We're not so much angry at him, or the BBC,
but at ourselves. Why did nobody say anything? (They tried.) Why did nobody do
anything? (They were afraid.) As a victim of repeated bullying, emotional abuse
and sexual harassment myself, let me tell you, it is the hardest thing in the
world to say something, let alone do something, about it.
I don't
make that admission lightly. To this day I am afraid of saying it. I am afraid
you will judge me, tell me it was my fault, that I wore the wrong dress, or
made a suggestive remark, that I am exaggerating, or that I couldn't take a
little office banter. But it wasn't like that. A bully had me in his clutches. He
was my direct employer, the proprietor of the company I worked for, who hired
and fired at will, and thus directly in control of my livelihood. He knew this
and took pains to remind me, every day, that if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't
have a job. He had me convinced that no one else would ever hire me, that only
he saw my special
talents, that everyone else thought I was a pain in the ass. A pain in the ass
I may have been, but that does NOT give a boss carte blanche to subject me, or
anyone, to months, even years, of abuse. So, as I said, I am guilty as charged.
I am guilty of not speaking up and complaining. When I finally did it was a small, quick, secretive private litigation that I won. I don’t remember the
exact wording of the paperwork, but I think I might have agreed, legally, never
to name him. I might have agreed to that. Like he deserved protecting.
It is, and
always has been, extraordinarily difficult to stand up to bullies. Clever
bullies make you think it's all your fault. They flatter (you can just hear JS:
"now then, now then, now then, do you know how gorgeous you look in that dress?")
and then they make it all your fault ("goodness gracious, will you look at
what you're doing
to me, will you look down there under my pants; how's about that, then?")
But he's
not here to defend himself. He lived in an era where sex with a 14 year-old
scantily clad teenybopper in a rock star’s dressing room was thought of as
being about as illegal as driving at 85mph on the motorway. If you get caught, you
get a ticket, but if no one catches you and no one gets hurt, no harm's done.
We now know that 14 year-old girls, whether they are throwing themselves at a
celebrity adult male or not, are more often than not irreparably damaged by
having sex with a man twice their age; even if they think they want it. That's
why the law exists to protect them. But it's more than just the age difference
(she says, defending herself after being so on the fence about Megan Stammers
and her teacher boyfriend). It's about power. Who holds more power in the Megan
Stammers situation? She does. He has more to lose. These days, if a man chooses
to get involved with an under-age girl, he knows he is likely to face the
consequences. He's likely to think long and hard as to whether it is worth the
risk. Is it love? Is it something he is committing to long term? Or is it for
kicks. Clearly in the case of Saville – since he was never reportedly in love
with any of these girls, or made a long-term relationship with one of them – it
was for kicks. Which makes him a predator, not a man who has simply fallen in
love with a woman who is not quite technically a woman yet.
James
Savile (interestingly, an over-sexed, confident and cunning Scorpio Tiger if
you believe in that malarkey) didn't just bully individuals, he bullied several
institutions, he bullied a corporation, he bullied the CPS (the British justice
system), he bullied a whole nation. He even—by default—bullied a monarchy. No
wonder no one stood up to him. He did not allow anyone to question him. We've
been told that when they did, he threatened them. He is beginning to sound like
nothing short of a tyrant. And he didn't stop there. Looking at the mess that
high-ranking BBC employees have found themselves in, he is clearly still bullying
from beyond the grave. Surely no one now thinks it was anything other than fear
that motivated poor Peter Rippon’s decision (whether or not it came from higher
up); fear of standing up to a bully. What might the Queen say? The Queen who in
fact, at the time of writing, has yet to say anything about all this (and you really would have thought she’d have learnt
her lesson after her faux pas in not making an immediate statement following the death of Princess
Diana—who, incidentally, was unquestionably the victim of bullying). The
British monarchy has a rather worrying and antiquated habit of sticking its
head in the sand when something uncomfortable crops up concerning “one of their
own.” As long as they continue to do this, bullies will not believe they are
ultimately accountable. It’s only a mere 500 years since we were allowing our
monarch to behead his wives without repercussion. The king was once able to
execute at will for what was called treason, but was really “disagreeing with
the monarch.” And you knew what would happen to you if you disagreed with the monarch’s right to execute
a person accused of treason. No wonder we have a legacy of fear. And look where
it’s got us. The BBC is reeling in the aftermath of mounting revelations about
sexual harassment on what appears to be an endemic scale. The whole situation
has called into question the very integrity of one of the most trusted
organizations in British history. What should we do now? Maybe we need to look
at how our American counterparts call their leaders to account.
The United
States, while in no way a perfect society, is a young country built on a
foundation of truth and justice at all costs. It is a nation that actively
disenfranchised itself from its founding state of barbaric British monarchs.
Accountability has always been at the heart of the US justice system; the
notion that no one is above the law is at the heart of its constitution. We may
still be fighting for equal rights in many arenas, but every citizen is
accountable for their actions, and entitled to a fair trail when their
behaviour is called into question. The American people even put their own
president on trial; they were prepared to lose one of the best presidents they
had ever elected because they insisted he be held accountable for his
unacceptable actions. I don’t see the Queen standing trial on behalf of her
knighted subject and employee (as far as he was an employee of a crown-owned
institution), Mr Savile, materializing as an event any time soon. Britain may
have invented human rights with the signing of the Magna Carter 800 years ago,
but it was the first independent American states that suggested, almost 600
years later, that no one man (or woman) was better than another by virtue of
his or her birth. Any man could become the head of state.
And any man
did.
And will
again.
Obama will
win another term not because he got everything right the first time (he didn’t)
but because he has always stood accountable to the American people. He has
always spoken up for what he, as a man, believes in... such as same-sex marriage.
People know they are voting for a man and not a party (or a party’s puppet). He
may not have been able to fulfil all the promises he made the first time
around, but he’s a decent, upstanding, trustworthy man of integrity. In fact
there’s so little dirt on this man, his opponents still have to harp on about
the insane notion that his birth certificate is a forgery. His opponents are
bullies who rely on little other than bullying tactics to make people scared to
stand up to them, lest they be cast out and end up all alone. Bigotry in
numbers works best, as everyone knows.
But aren’t
I being slightly harsh on the bullies here? Let’s hear it for the bullies for a
moment. What maketh the bully?
Most
bullies are, as we know, cowards. They are so afraid of being nobodies, of
being alone, that they will covet power at all costs. They do not want to
govern, they want to rule. They do not want to lead, they want to be followed.
They have insecure egos that need feeding with adoration. Why? Most likely
because they, themselves, were the victims of bullies. To stop it, we need to
break the chain, and it needs to start at the top. We need to end the era of
accepting "untouchables". Just because a person is born into a certain
family, or blessed by the pope, or has raised a million for the homeless, or is
running for president, does not make them a good person by default. They must
be judged directly, and solely, on their actions. Indeed the actions of these
people, because
they are part of the elite, must be more visible and accountable than even the
common man.
Going back
to Jim, I wonder if someone perhaps bullied our idolized British icon?
(Incidentally, if you're American and you're reading this and you're struggling
to relate to Jimmy Savile, think Jerry Sandusky and multiply by at least ten.)
What exactly do we know about him? That he never married, that he lived his
whole life with his mother and preserved her room as she left it when she died,
reportedly even dry-cleaning her clothes once a year. Hold on! Did no one think
this was a little weird? A night at the Bates Motel? Anyone? He was just a
little eccentric, was he? Maybe his mother had him under her spell? Maybe it
was someone else. I doubt we’ll ever know the whole truth.
I look back
at the people who bullied me. In every single case (except the last, when I
broke the pattern) I thought it was my fault, that I had done something wrong,
either by being not good enough, or being too good. Perversely, I even looked
up to some of those bullies and yearned for their acceptance, such was the
depth of my low self-esteem.
And another
reason victims of bullying don’t speak out is, who the hell wants to live
through the whole sick ordeal again? Being asked, “So where exactly did he put
his hands? And where did he put your hands? And he pushed your head in which
direction exactly? Are you sure it was at that exact angle? Did you ever
actually utter the word ‘no’?” Not only that, but you’re expected to have proof
as well. “Yes, there was me, him and his BMW that he pulled into an underground
parking lot when he was meant to be giving me a ride home. Ask his wing mirror,
it will swear it’s all true.” No thanks. I’ll just get on with my life and take
it to my grave. Bullies depend on victims thinking like this. They
specifically pick victims they are sure will think like this. They do not pick
people with high self-esteem, they pick people who have such a lack of self
worth that they even doubt themselves. Did it really hurt so bad? Surely
someone else has it worse than me. If I complain, I could easily lose my
job/not be able to pay the mortgage/feed the kids.
If you have
even the merest suspicion that you were perhaps bullied by someone, anyone, in
your past, then you were. If you have ever, vaguely, sort of, in a low moment,
faintly worried that you were abused, then you were. Get over it, forgive and forget,
but don’t play it down, because we know what happens to victims of bullying who
bury their pain. Don’t be a victim; be a survivor. If it ever happens again,
tell people. Even if they don’t believe you or nothing comes of it, just
telling people will make it real for you, and make you less likely to accept it
happening the next time. Because if we don’t know how to protect ourselves, as
adult victims of bullying, how can we protect our children?
The human
race has a long history of abusing children. Only recently have we begun to
agree that it is wrong. It is absolutely imperative that we do everything in
our power and stop at nothing to stamp it out.
Last night,
the BBC, desperate to prove that it is not afraid of pointing the finger
inwards, that it holds itself accountable to the British people, broadcast a
Panorama special about the whole affair, and today it sent its head honcho to
answer questions in parliament. Day late and a dollar short, I'd say. I haven't
seen the Panorama programme yet because I can't get the BBC iPlayer where I currently live (in France) but I've read reviews (on the BBC website of course),
and I watched a short clip of former BBC Director-General Greg Dyke explaining
how most commissioning editors at the Beeb feel they are autonomous, that their
duty is to the British public before the D-G (Q.E.D. by Panorama). But it
doesn't matter what they show us now, we want to know what the hell they were doing
then. Talk about
closing the stable door after the horse has bolted. The BBC has just been exposed as
an elitist, unregulated sham of an institution. We can now imagine years and
years of secretaries suffering in silence, brilliant women being passed over
for promotion, talented individuals being marginalized for "not playing
ball". Everyone can see it for what it is now, and it’s shaken the country
to its core.
My rose-coloured glasses, I must admit, came off a little while
back.
I yearned
for that elusive "Top of the Pops" ticket when I was 12, about as
much as I yearned for Jim to “fix it” for me (so glad he didn’t now!) In the
days before You Tube, and Facebook, and X Factor, it was the only way to get
your five minutes of fame if you weren’t actually that special, to be part of
something big and wonderful and glittery, always thinking, Oh, will I ever be
picked?! Will I ever be good enough, or cool enough, or lucky enough to get in?!
Well I finally got to go to Top of the Pops when I was around 30, on a kind of
VIP ticket, as I knew a producer. It was a huge disappointment. All I saw was a
load of overpaid pop stars drinking too much and taking cocaine in the green
room. Yes… I said it, I have seen illegal drugs taken on the BBC premises. Why didn't I report it immediately?
Are you serious? I guess I should have complained about John Leslie groping me,
too, on a separate occasion. But you don't. You don't want to be cast out once
you're in. So you "pay your dues". The same goes for many elitist
institutions, like expensive British boarding schools, the armed forces, or the
Catholic church. Even now I'm scared. Even now, a small voice in me says,
"Be quiet.
What if someone reads this one day and subsequently doesn't hire you for a dream
job?" (Maybe I have to trust that someone could hire me because of it.)
I have
often been part of organizations in which I didn't really feel I belonged, and
thus I lived my whole life in fear. If I criticize, I will be cast out, because
I am officially a nobody, and the elite classes and power-hungry heads of big
establishments will continue to remind me that I should not forget my place.
Well my
place, I finally worked out, was not on my knees under the desk of some
repulsive man on whom I believed my future wellbeing depended. My place is at
my computer, writing, and publishing freely in this incredible domain that we
call the Internet, in the hope that my words might give just one person the
courage to stand up to a bully and break a chain, in the hope that we continue
to talk about this issue and join forces to stamp out bullying of any kind, and fight to protect our children from any form of abuse.
And your
place—if you’re a US citizen—is out at the polling stations on Tuesday,
November 6th, ensuring that your country doesn’t lose a decent,
fair, accountable man at its helm.
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